The Key to Success
I was talking to a group and this question was asked: “With all the people you have coached, what’s the one thing that is the key to success?” I smiled. I love this question. Because the answer is so simple – but it’s not easy.
I know, I know. It is a word that is thrown around so often we have almost trained ourselves to become numb to it. Ignoring it like it’s the big pimple in the middle of the speaker’s forehead. You don’t want to recognize it but it’s hard not to. So, you change the subject, thinking there’s nothing you can really do about it. You tell yourself it doesn’t apply to you. It’s too “woo-woo”, and you stay far away from anything that resembles a crystal or smells like patchouli.
The truth is, mindset is actually very scientific. Joe Dispenze, DC says the following in his book, Evolve Your Brain: The Sicence of Changing Your Mind
“Whether we like it or not, once a thought happens in the brain, the rest is history. All of the bodily reactions that occur from both our intentional or unintentional thinking unfold behind the scenes of our awareness. When you come right down to it, it is startling to realize how influential and extensive the effects of one or two conscious or unconscious thoughts can be.”
When you think about something stressful, your body immediately begins to release cortisol. When you are nervous, your stomach may get queasy. When you are excited, you may get butterflies in your belly. And when you are sad, you may feel a lump in your throat. These are just a few examples of how our body responds to our thoughts and feelings.
So, if our thoughts can cause our body to react, why do we think that mindset has nothing to do with success? If we tell ourselves we aren’t good at making sales calls, how do you think our body will respond when we need to make a sales call? Yes, sometimes you have to push past the fear in order to make things happen. However, how much more effective (and pleasant) would it be if we just believed we were good at it? Instead of dreading making sales calls, we could train ourselves to look forward to it. WHAT????
I know this is true, first-hand. When I was about 4 or 5-years old, I was scared to ride a bike without training wheels. I was a shy, very timid child who was scared of pretty much everything. My grandmother had a neighbor whose daughter was about my same age. One day I was visiting my grandma and the neighbor girl was outside. She was struggling to ride her two-wheel bike. She asked me if I knew how to ride. I didn’t want her to think I didn’t so I, very pridefully told her, “Yeah.” (Kind of like, I can’t believe you don’t know how…) I obviously had not thought this through (similar to my headband on picture day story – but that’s for another time). She immediately decided that I needed to show her and help her do it too. Ummm… The lump in my throat and my queasy stomach told me I should have kept my mouth shut or been truthful. But the pride in me caused me to get my mind and body going. I distinctly remember telling myself, “You can do this. You have practiced many times. This is it. You HAVE to do this now. You don’t want to be seen as a liar. You told her you could ride, now you have to show her you can.”
So, I got on that bike like I had been doing it for years. I pushed off and wobbled down the street. I don’t remember how far it was the first time, but I kept riding and then I encouraged her that she could do it too. It was all I could do to not run into my grandma’s house with excitement that I rode a two-wheeler all by myself but, you know, I had to keep up the charade. I did what I had thought was impossible just minutes before. I pushed through the fear, and I told myself I could. And I did.
You can, too. Mindset, which includes self-talk, is EVERYTHING. When we believe in ourselves and have a positive outlook, we can truly accomplish what we desire. If you want to build an empire and makes millions of dollars, you can. If you want to build a business that allows you to work 3 days a week and be able to travel every other month, you can. If you want to lose 10 pounds before your reunion, you can.
So, next time you hear the word “mindset,” instead of running the other way, take a moment to examine yours. What is your attitude right now? What are you thinking? What are you telling yourself?
I help business owners and individuals with mindset. If you struggle, or just want to understand how you can make small shifts for dramatic changes, reach out – I know how to ride a two-wheeler.
Michelle Froedge is a residential Realtor and Principal Broker in the Greater Nashville and Williamson County areas of Tennessee. “Mom” to four-legged fur baby, Tyler, Auntie to Zelamie, she is a vegetarian and sings in her spare time. Michelle has lived in Nashville and Franklin since 1997 and has been selling homes since 2004.